I decided to learn 10 languages in 10 years.
I am a communicator. I enjoy conversation.
Let me rephrase that, I enjoy meaningful conversation.
This year is for Bahasa Indonesia. Three months in and I am confident I’ll be fluent by the end of the year. I imagine other languages will come faster. I’ve heard that, once you learn a second language the ones that follow are easier.
It’s like I can feel the brain opening. Languages are not so much separate anymore but rather other ways to communicate.
More words.
Today I was having a conversation in Indonesian. I realized most authentic communication is subtle unspoken things, a feeling or gesture.
Because our cultures keep us bound to be polite. And our human nature makes us want to avoid discomfort. We fail to say what we actually mean. But if you are listening it is being said.
It’s just not spoken.
I have a friend named Ahmad. He is Muslim. In Bali it’s perfectly natural to point out and ask someone’s religion. In fact it’s printed on the Bali drivers license. Religion goes with common conversations…
Where are you from (who’s your tribe)?
Are you married?
Do you have kids?
What is your religion? Perhaps to say, what is your disposition on the world?
Back to Ahmad, he and I became friends before I could speak Indonesian. Our conversations happened first in the eyes. We’d say, do you feel me? Do you understand what I am gesturing?
Soon our conversations became single words repeated…
Me: Strong?
Ahmad (nodding): Kuat!
Me: Strong?
Ahmad (shaking a bamboo post): Kuat!
Me: Strong?
Ahmad: Kuat!
Together we build a cow feeding station. My design and Ahmad’s masterful bamboo carpentry.
I learnt about Ahmad as I watched him build. Fast short blows carving bamboo. It was clear he has some skills. Turns out, Ahmad was a farmer and creating this sort of structure was a breeze for him.
Our bamboo feeding station is kuat.
Now Ahmad and I could talk more. We don’t. Our eyes have told our story. I know Ahmad is driven. I know he is honest. I know that he has my back.
Each time I see him we gaze into each other’s eyes. The gaze is longer because we don’t talk. We just want to check-in with each other. I think if we talked more our long gaze would feel less appropriate. But like I said. Language is like that.
The world talks too much. We hide behind cultures and their social structures, pleasantries and words. Language inhibits real communication. Connection.
I am a communicator. I enjoy conversation.
What I enjoy most is connection . . . the spoken word, a simple gesture, or the long gaze into the soul.